Skeletons Are Hot (Sans x Male Reader)
by memedoq
Summary: Parental figures causing stress at home finally push you, an anxious and shy transmale by the name of Chris, to leave the nest. You soon become roommates with two oddly entertaining skele brothers and that is just the start of it. Just what might happen when you realize you're attracted to a skeleton? (this fic will def get smutty so prepare ur bones nyeh heh heh)
1. Intro

===this is a M/M fic, reader is a transmale===

I have not written a smutty nor fluffy fanfic in a LONG time so be gentle senpai

if people dislike the use of a name then i might edit it as a '===' to allow people to picture their own name but for now, Chris it is!

Anyway Enjoy you dirty skeleton fuckers ;^)

* * *

 _ **[ Chap 1: What might happen when you realize you're attracted to a skeleton?]**_

* * *

Snow and angry wind shook around the small yellow cab, the heater almost wasn't enough seeing how it was outside.

You clutched a small cage covered in a blanket that contained your pet gecko, and your suitcase sitting next to you on the seat just as tight. "M-make a right on blizzard street, house number 420(blaze it)" You speak quietly but loud enough for the driver to hear.

You, a young man, just now turning 20, were headed for your new home. You never thought the day would come, you were excited but probably a little more anxious to tell the truth. You had lived with your mother for.. well your entire life! Through struggles and triumphs you both managed to live happily. But when your mother finally got re-married; things didn't go too well. In fact, they went quite bad.

Your step-father was stern and old-fashioned, believing anyone who was a second older than 18 should not be living with his parents. It didn't help that he didn't understand you being transgender either and in fact, tried to constantly tell you, you needed to see a doctor because 'something was wrong with you'. You downright, hated him. Even being on testosterone and having had top surgery earlier that year didn't change anything in his mind. He still didn't want to understand. It made you sick, and ultimately, that is what pushed you to finally make the move to your own place.

Well, to say 'your own place' was sort of exaggerating. You weren't even able to rent a one bedroom apartment with your low-ass salary and hell you really only wanted to find someone renting a room. But as luck turns out you found what you were looking for! Or at least you hoped. The ad was odd and silly to read: [I THE GREAT PAPYRUS AM RENTING A ROOM. SAID ROOM HAS A BED AND EXERCISE EQUIPMENT IN THE CORNER FOR HIS OR HER EXERCISING PLEASURE! HOME COOKED MEALS OF SPAGHETTI WILL BE PROVIDED! PLEASE CALL FOR MORE INFO AND ASK FOR _'THE'_ GREAT PAPYRUS!] You called; wondering if it was a joke ad but despite the strange wording online, it was indeed a real ad! The price was very cheap too, probably because it was in the poorer side of the city and the room had especially been a storage room, but you didn't mind one bit.

Finally, the orange, rabbit-like monster wearing a checked cabbie hat turned back at you "Here we are Sir. House number: 420" The cab came to a halt.

Your eyes, almost as icy blue as the wind outside, squint to look out the window coated in a thin layer of ice. A cozy looking, 2-story home with warm yellow lights lit and welcoming was visible. You nervously glanced at the address one last time on the crumpled piece of paper _just_ to be sure..

"Ah yes! T-thank you" You speak up and shuffle a hand in your coat's pocket before pulling out a 20 and 5 dollar bill, telling the rabbit he can keep the change as you hand it to him. He offers to help, but being as anxious as you already were, you shake your head. Though you kind of regret it after you stumble into the storm and out of the warmth.

Taking one glance back as the cab drives off in a huff of fog, you turn your attention to the house in front of you. It wasn't very big nor very small, but looked cozy. The look of it…fills you with determination.

You gulp, holding your small amount of belongings and step forward, fisting your gloved hand and hit your knuckles against the door.

'Thunk Thunk'

After a few moments of silence, you hear shuffling and finally the door literally SWUNG open. You jump back slightly and crane your neck to be able to fully look up at this 7 foot, VERY enthusiastic skeleton standing before you.

"GREETINGS SHORT ONE! I THE GREAT PAPYRUS MUST ASSUME YOU ARE THE ONE WHO WOULD GREATLY LOVE TO INHABIT THIS WONDROUS ABODE!"

You start to almost wonder if this was a good idea, your heart pounded and you swore you were almost sweating in this freezing weather. But when you think about it, a loud skeleton was better than a mean step-father. You took in a shaky breath and nodded quickly. "Y-y-yeah that's me..!" You stutter in a nervous tone. "COME IN COME IN SMALL HUMAN!" He places a mitted hand excitedly on the back of your shoulder, gently ushering you in and taking your suit case. "THIS WAY TO THE ROOM YOU WISH TO INHABIT!" You hastily follow after his long strided movements and up the stairs, taking a glance at the hallway and décor that hung on it as you follow him. You remember him saying his older brother lived here with him, but you saw no sign of anyone else.

"Hey"

You were mid-stride, looking at a picture of a cute white dog on the wall when you hear a voice and bump into someone abruptly, nearly dropping the cage holding your gecko. " Whoa! O-oh crap sorry-" You instinctively look up, expecting to see the tall skeleton, but when you noticed him halfway down the hall and nowhere near you, you immediately flick your eyes down. A new skeleton had appeared and was standing in front of you. He was a LOT shorter than Mr Papyrus and he was grinning very widely, so wide that you almost felt uncomfortable.

"Hehe no sweat, kid. You alright?" He finally spoke, and his voice felt smooth, deep and gentle and for some reason it made you feel very calm.

You open your mouth to shyly reply but a loud voice boomed in, cutting you off. "AH! I SEE YOU HAVE MET MY BROTHER, SANS!" Papyrus strode over quickly, his face full of excitement. The shorter skeleton, Sans was it? Didn't seem at all phased by his brother's sudden loud voice. "BROTHER, THIS IS THE HUMAN WHO WISHES TO INHABIT THE SPARE ROOM! HIS NAME IS- UH.." He looked puzzled and laughed bashfully, leaning down all the way so he could 'whisper' in your ear. "SHORT HUMAN.. WHAT WAS YOUR NAME AGAIN?" Had you really not introduced yourself this entire time? You felt embarrassed. "Oh uh.. m-my name is Chris!" You try and smile, trying hard to hide how anxious you felt right now. It wasn't really them that made you anxious, you just generally had bad social anxiety even in your early childhood years. Your gender transition didn't help aid it at all and you slowly just became anti-social, trying to avoid people when you could help it.

"Nice to meet'cha Chris, let's hope I don't slip a _disk"_

Did he just make a pun? Did this short skeleton just make a freaking pun? You smile a bit wider and chuckle. "Please don't because things would turn rather _brisk_ " You weren't too good with puns in any sort but Sans seemed amused nontheless because it got a chuckle out of him. You two were cut short when Papyrus jumped in eagerly. "NO TIME FOR PUNS, WE MUST MAKE HASTE CHRIS THE SHORT HUMAN" He almost drags you down the hallway before you can catch your footing and trot along with him quickly. The short skeleton followed behind you two, snickering quietly at the sight.

You enter the small but surprisingly comfortable looking room. The walls were painted a red and it had hard wooden floors. In one corner was the bed with a small night stand next to it, a Mettaton shaped lamp sitting atop it. A few large pillows and a soft looking blanket draped carefully over the bed. In the corner was the exercise pieces and equipment all jumbled together and an empty closet with a mirror on the door. "DOES THIS ROOM SUIT YOU, DEAR HUMAN?" You were smiling happily and nodded. "Yeah! I love it" You were suddenly not nervous at all and walked in further, placing your gecko's cage on your bed,removing the blanket covering it.

"OOO! HUMAN! WAS IS THAT SMALL CREATURE YOU POSSESS?" Papyrus nearly runs over and sans follows curiously. They both gather close to the glass tank, a small spotted gecko looked up at them nervously.

"That is my leopard gecko buddy, his name is Big Boss"

"Hehe a big name for a little gecko" Sans snickers and you do as well. "That was the idea" You wink and he grins.

"WHAT A CUTE THING IT IS" Papyrus seemed completely in awe at the small little critter. Maybe lizards weren't common pets to skeletons? Either way he seemed in love with it. How cute!

You watch the tall skeleton fawn, sparkly eyed, at the confused little critter for a few moments before you start to unpack your belongings.

"C'mon bro, lets' let the kid chill for a bit, aight?" Sans pats his younger brother who seems sad to say goodbye to the gecko but stands up fully and nods. "YES! OF COURSE! I THE GREAT PAPYRUS HOPE THAT YOU, SAID HUMAN, HAVE A GOOD TIME 'CHILLING!' " He smiles happily down at you, his enthusiastic attitude makes you smile just as wide. "I will , thank you!"

As they head out of the room, Papyrus turns again. "OH! BEFORE I FORGET! I WILL COOK SOMETHING ESPECIALLY DELICIOUS TONIGHT BECAUSE OF YOUR ARRIVAL! BE PREPARED FOR THE HOME COOKED MEAL OF A LIFE TIME, MADE BY I THE GREAT PAPYRUS" He holds a mitted hand against his chest proudly and you can hear sans chuckling behind him.

"SEE YOU SOON CHRIS THE SHORT HUMAN!" And with that he gingerly closed the door and the room became silent.

You finish unpacking relatively fast and decide to relax under the covers for awhile before dinner time."Maybe I'll take a short na-yawn-p.." Your words are muffled by a sign of tiredness and you only now realize how completely exhausted you were. … and with that, you fell asleep.

[Notes: I promise another chapter will be posted momentarily! I am just too tired to keep typing right now ahah! Stay tuned ;^)]


	2. Too many bad puns

I typed so much more than i was meaning to woops!

More to come after this ;^)

* * *

 ** _[Chapter 2: Too many bad puns]_**

* * *

"HUMAN! …HUMAN?! HUMAN ARE YOU IN THERE?!"

You jolt up and your eyes flicking open, startled by the wake up call. It takes you a few seconds to realize where you were and who was talking. "Yea-yawn-h..! I'm here!" You speak up enough for the voice to hear you and groggily, you slide from the bed towards the bedroom door. You are greeted by the towering skeleton. "HUMAN! THE HOME COOKED MEAL, AS PROMISED, IS NOW COMPLETE!" And without waiting for you to even reply he takes your hand and pulls you along the hallway. You were still half asleep as he eagerly spoke. "I HOPE YOU LIKE SPAGHETTI. BECAUSE I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAVE PREPARED THE FINEST OF THE FINEST SPAGHETTI AND MEAT BALLS FOR SAID MEAL"

Spaghetti actually sounded really good right about now. You hadn't had anything in spaghetti form that wasn't in a can of Chef Boyardee for a very long time. "Sounds good!" You reply with a smile. But as you two enter the small kitchen, smells that were much less the opposite of 'good' filled your nose. "S-smells … good..!" You stammer and take a seat at the nicely set kitchen table. The kitchen was small but seemed big enough to do the job. You glance over and see the shorter skeleton, Sans, sitting next to you, arms leaning on the table and hands knit neatly together.

Papyrus placed what you _assumed_ was spaghetti and meatballs. On the dish was a mixture of burnt and undercooked noodles. But the sauce and meatballs looked normal and edible. "Ah..t-thank you for the meal!" You speak kindly to Papyrus. "NOT A PROBLEM HUMAN! EXPECT HOME COOKED MEALS OF THIS QUALITY EVERY NIGHT!" He smiles proudly but you just chuckle nervously. And as they sit down and begin to dig in, you do too. Or try to.

You mostly just eat the meatballs and sauce which tasted pretty good, but for the noodles, you had a hard time even getting them to on the fork.

"So, how do you like it here so far?"

A smooth and much quieter voice questions you. It was Sans. "Ahh I really like it a lot!" You reply in a joyful manner and you weren't lying! The only thing you didn't like was the spaghetti but hell you could live with that! Surprisingly, despite these two being near strangers and this home brand new, you felt very comfortable and safe here already. You loved that.

"I can tell I'm going to really enjoy it here..!"

Papyrus seemed so overjoyed by what you said; he had stars in his eyes. "REALLY? OH WONDROUS NEWS, DEAR HUMAN! I THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND MY BROTHER SHALL MAKE SURE YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED!"

Sans smiled wide too, even though that seemed to be the only expression he had on his face.

Sans grabs the bottle of ketchup at the center of the table and unscrewed the cap. Was he going to add ketchup to the spaghe-

You stared, dumbfounded as the shorter skeleton began drinking the condiment. He notices you staring and chuckles. "Why the long face?" He grinned wide at you. "N-nothing it's just.. I've never seen someone drink ketchup before!"

He chuckles. "Really now? You really need to _relish_ it more often and _ketchup_ with the times" You almost facepalm but resist and instead, snort at his puns. "Haha very _PUNNY_ of you" Oh no now you've started it too.

"NO! NOW YOU HAVE CAUSED THE HUMAN TO PUN JUST AS YOU DO SANS!" Papyrus whined dramatically and you and the short skellyman both snicker. "You need to take a _dill_ pill bro, we're only having _BUN_ "

Ok that one was BAD even for a literal, punny little skeleton.

Laughter ensues between the three of you for a few minutes before it slowly begins to die down and things become calmer again. When everyone is finished with the meal; Sans starts to clears the table but Papyrus insists that HE clean the dishes instead since he was the one who cooked but Sans just shrugs and ignores his little brother's demands. You smile at the brothers and pocket your hand, fishing out your phone to reply to some texts.

You can feel a stare on you and glance up, seeing the shorter skeleton watching you silently with his hands in his pockets, sitting at the table once again. You flick your eyes to the side, feeling just slightly anxious. You didn't like being the center of attention, nor being watched. You didn't know what to say but Sans spoke before you could think of something.

"So, why don't you tell us more about you, Chris~" He grins wide and moves his arms up, elbows leaning against the table and he bridges his hands under his chin.

"YES HUMAN! TELL US MORE!" Pap chimes.

"…W-well.." You scratch the back of your neck with one hand and shove your phone back into your pocket with the other. Your heart began to thump but you tried to ignore it. You really couldn't think of anything to say. "Uhm..I work at GameStop and I love cinnamon rolls"

Sans eyes light up. "Hah really? I love going to GameStop, I might have to stop by the location you work at sometime" He winks at you.

"Oh! You like video games too?" You question him, kind of excited now. If one thing got you out of your shell: it was video games!

You only owned a 3DS yourself, but still played your share of games, both console and PC.

"Hell yeah I do" He hops from the chair and walks into the living room. You watch for a moment, unsure if you should follow or not but decide you would.

The short statured skeleton was shuffling with the TV stand, opening the door of the cabinet and your eyes lit up. "WHOAH!"

A ps4, xbox 360, gamecube and a wiiU were all hooked up with plenty of games to boot.

"I'm going to love it here" You say with a very wide smile, trotting over to the couch eagerly as Sans fumbles with the game systems, chuckling. "Good~"

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE PLAYING OF SAID 'VIDEO' GAMES" Papyrus walks in, using finger quotes at the word 'video games'.

"THEY ARE BORING AND CAUSE THAT HORRIBLE COUCH POTATO DISEASE I'VE HEARD ABOUT FROM YOU HUMANS!"

You can't help but burst out laughing at his comment and he seems to pout, arms crossing.

"S-sorry!" You wipe a tear from your eye. "A couch potato isn't a disease; it just means you are lazy"

"OH! WELL SANS MUST BE THE BIGGEST COUCH POTATO THEN! THAT IS ALL HE DOES!"

You laugh loudly again, god you loved these guys even if you had just met them a few hours ago.

"Keep laughing like that and you're going to end up _mashed_ "

"Oh my god" You reply, a few more giggles escaping your throat as the aftermath of the laugh attack ends. Phew. A good laugh always put you in a good mood. You forgot about being anxious at all.

Papyrus soon leaves for his room, saying his action figures needed to be cleaned. Adorable Fellow.

Sans gently prods at your arm with the video game controller and you take it gingerly. Your finger brushed against his skeletal hand and you are surprised at how cold and smooth it was.

"Got any requests" He gestures his skull in the direction of the TV, the ps4 menu on screen.

"Do you have Fallout 4?"

"Heh of course I do" He replies with a smile and gets off the couch to get the game set up.

"Nice!"

You were so happy your new roommates were so friendly. When you first set it in your mind that you were going to move out of your parents home you really didn't know what to expect. You were glad though, that your first new friends were Sans and Papyrus.

The presence of the skeleton sitting back down popped you out of thought and you two started the game.

After you and him had been playing for an hour and a half a slow moment between quests made you a little bored.

Sans pulled a ketchup bottle from his hoodie pocket (How did that even fit in there?) and began sipping it. You were still surprised how a skeleton could eat and why he'd choose ketchup as his meal of choice.

"mm- want some?" He offered the bottle after he noticed you eyeing him.

"N-nah.. I'm good" You mutter with a smile. He shrugs his shoulders high with a lazy grin. "More for me"

You continue the game play for a short amount of time, ending up dying right at the end of a quest.

"Fuck you!" You curse under your breath at the fictional enemy who couldn't even hear you on screen.

"Already wanting to jump my bones? Heh At least take me on a date first" Sans sends a wink in your direction.

Your heart smacks against your ribcage, pounding rapidly, you were completely caught you off guard.

"Wh! N-no! I didn't mean..!" You sputter words out quickly, and your face burns a bright pink.

"Haha I'm just kidding, kid" He seems amused, snickering.

Fuck why were you so awkward You exhale, trying to calm down but couldn't stop blushing. Why were you so embarrassed? The comment had caught you off guard but it shouldn't have made you this flustered…you weren't even attracted to skeletons!

"G-good one you nerd" You try and brush it off but you were clearly blushing even harder by the second.

"Get any redder and you might just turn into a tomato" He teases and you try let out a laugh. "Please don't turn me into ketchup"

He found that hilarious, and for the first time you could hear his bones rattling from his laughter. (you literally _RATTLED HIS BONES_ )

The skeleton finally lets out a slow yawn at the end of his laugh attack and it fell quiet.

" _Tibia_ honest, s'probably time I hit the sack" He smiles lazily. You feel a bit sad but ignore it; opening our mouth to reply and hope to god your voice doesn't crack. It does.

"O-ok! I hope you sleep good Mr. Couch Potato" You force a smile on your still pink face as you look at him. Sans snorts. "Sleep well yourself, Mr. Tomato Face"

You thump him in the arm with a fisted hand, too light to call it a punch and laugh.

He slips off his seat and starts to waddle away sleepily. "You can play as long as you want just keep it the volume on the down-low, aight?" You nod. "Alright"

He lifts his hand as a goodbye gesture and as your eyes flick down to the controller for a split-second, he's disappeared by the time you look up again. 'Kinda creepy' you think.

Running a hand through your hair you lean back into the couch. A long exhale escapes your lungs and that is when you finally realize; Fuck.

You think you might be attracted to a skeleton.

 **[Notes: i hope you guys enjoy! I wrote this again, while half asleep so hopefully there won't be too many spelling errors ahaha!]**


End file.
